I like everything staying where I put it. I like my mess being my mess. I like not having to be concerned about dinner. I like small amounts of laundry.
With that said, I love when the kids ARE home. I love their friends. I love the gatherings.
And, last Wednesday when Peter went back it was the first time since he went to college that I cried a little when he left. Not because I was sad, quite the opposite, I am so proud of this kid. I like him. He's a kind, considerate, fun person. He plays baseball so I probably won't see him again until May. Unless I go to a game... That's a long time to not see him live and in person.
On Monday night I dropped Bella back off. I talk to her all the time - via text, email, FB messages and calls. I am still the chauffeur, so I didn't shed tears. She too is growing, and changing, and finding her way and it isn't always easy. I am so proud of how she is handling what life is throwing at her. She'll be back in March.
While all of that was happening, so too was the death of many amazing and talented people in the arts. Their gifts are numerous and the beauty of their occupation is they do kind of live on forever. I have devoured articles, quotes, and tweets. I have watched videos galore about everyone who has died. I have learned more about David Bowie than I ever thought I cared to know about. I loved this, written by Marc Elliot on cnn.com about Glenn Frey:
When we mourn for Frey, are we mourning our lost selves and a time when we all thought we could live hard and stay free and surf and bike and run and jump and love and never lose because we were forever young?
The Eagles truly defined years of my life. YEARS. I wonder what music will be my kids soundtracks when they are adults? Peter's will probably be a country rap. Bella will embrace all things alternative.
I remember singing this song. LOUDLY. Mostly with Carolyn and Heidi. Feel free to sing along if you're so inclined.
You can see the stars and still not see the light (that's right)