As you may recall, my goal was to start each day of March with a quote from Rumi. You won't be surprised to learn that I still have a folder full of quotes I haven't used, yet. I love that 700 years after he wrote them, his words continue to strike a chord. I believe it's because so much of what he wrote of was love. We can never have too love.

When I posted my blog about finally being done in the basement yesterday, my friend Leigh wrote this comment, "Congratulations! And how appropriate that you finished now, today, at the time of re-birth....one more step taken towards transformation...." I hadn't really thought of that, but the timing was exactly perfect.

With each item that I kept, donated, tossed or sold, there was a piece of "me" that was part of it too. It was an emotional experience that took me far longer than I ever anticipated it would. My mother was who pointed out the symbolism of letting go of the parts of me. It wasn't just 10 years of Stampin' Up! items that left the building; it was 18 years of living in this house that was leaving as well. I had to go carefully. I had to go slowly. What stays? What goes? There is still another side of the basement to tackle. Too many bins of every blessed item I saved from the kids. They are at an age where I think we can go through it and decide if we really need every scribble from day care they ever did. I think we can probably pare it down. I hope we can.

I also realized as I was falling asleep last night, it was VERY hard for me to "do" all the work I was doing all at the same time. Yes, I imposed a 53 day challenge for myself, and I am very glad I did, because without it, I may have gone on a total food bender. Mind, body, food, spirit, and basement all at the same time was huge. To me. To someone else it might have been no big deal. For me, if was a gargantuan effort. For many years, the basement was a place I went to hide from my own unhappiness. I had to face that. It was exhausting. I took a break from journaling. My last entry was on March 13, (I just looked) and it's not even a complete journal entry. It followed a complete break down on March 12; a journal entry that was so emotional I know it will be a long time before I read it again. (I don't tend to re-read what I've written, but every once in a while I go back to see if I have actually come as far as I think I have.) I needed a break from something as simple as writing in a journal; something I do for my own good. I haven't lit a candle since then. I haven't pulled a card. So, you see, there was an awful lot of processing going on.

This week, I did something I haven't done since, probably, October. I read fiction. I disappeared from reality for a while each night. It was a treat to read something mindless that didn't require a highlighter or the use of my brain. I loved every second of it.

I have a jam packed week coming up. I am very excited to be heading on a yoga and hiking retreat Friday through Sunday. My last retreat was in late October. That experience opened up parts of me that had been shut down. I fully expect the same thing to happen this weekend. According to my mom, the location is "magical." I suspect there will be more than one Glass House Retreat planned for there.

And so, on this Easter Sunday, wash yourself of yourself. It is a time of rebirth. Most importantly, be kind to everyone, INCLUDING, and especially yourself. We're all worth it.

As always, please feel free to comment, share, and let me know what you think. xo

As I was typing this I had Pandora on. Lots of music came on, but I was especially surprised when a Fleetwood Mac instrumental came on. Who knew? I loved the title. THAT song was immediately followed by perhaps my very favorite Hot Tuna instrumental. 
Coincidence? Of course not.

Fleetwod Mac ~ "Sunny Side Of Heaven"
http://youtu.be/6EbyRKMzirg

Hot Tuna ~ "Water Song"
http://youtu.be/6giiYDlqRQs

THIS all began on January 13. It seems like a lifetime ago. Seriously. In between this giant pile of 20 boxes I had an additional 13 ebay auctions. I didn't make anywhere near what I fantasized about. But, to quote my dear friend Jeannie, "Was it making you any money just sitting in your basement?" Um. NO.

And so, just a few minutes ago I taped up the very last box of Stampin' Up! items I am going to list on one giant auction. I don't have the patience to even begin to sell everything individually. There are PLENTY of eBay sellers who do. Bless their hearts.

Off to go list it. 

Cheer for me, would you?!

UPDATE: Here's the eBay listing. I am pretty darned excited!

It's a beautiful Saturday morning. That's something to find joy in.

I will pack my LAST box of Stampin' Up! stuff today, seal it and finally, nearly 12 weeks after the adventure started, list the humongous auction on eBay. There is INSANE joy in that.

I have healthy, happy, funny kids. More joy.

I am going on a much anticipated yoga and hiking retreat next week. Oh, you know that brings me joy.

I will walk the river later on. I have fantastically colorful new sneakers to break in. I will photograph them for the 53 for Me blog. Joy.

What ordinary part of YOUR day brings YOU joy? Please share.

You are totally going to want to dance with joy listening to this!
http://youtu.be/NiTcmahEjiY
Feelin' Alright, un-huh...
NOTE: I just looked up the lyrics - they're not terribly joyful.
Dance anyway...  ;-)

In my life, I have lived on both sides of the miracle thought process. I have discovered, it is far more enriching to believe everything is a miracle.

Are there times when life isn't quite as miraculous as I wish it was? Of course. Do I sometimes wish for something fervently while knowing the likelihood of it happening is little to none? Yes I do. Sometimes I set expectations that really are impossible to attain. For instance, I can't wish myself to be a lottery winner ~ I can put it out there, but the chance of it happening is pretty slim. I can't wish myself the optimum body - oh, trust me on that! I have to help the miracles happen. And most importantly, when they do, I have to be aware that they ARE happening. Not every miracle will be earth shattering. I'd be exhausted if they were! Sometimes, it's really the little things all added up that create miracles that I can really pay attention to.

What are some of YOUR miracles? Please share! I  will keep asking for sharing and feedback here ~ really, do feel free the write in the comments. I love that. It's my tiny little miracle to know you are out there reading.  xo

Here are some of the things I think of as miracles:
Waking up every day ~ miracle
Babies laughing ~ miracle
My kids ~ miracles
Coffee ~ huge miracle
The senses ~ miracles
Belief in myself ~ miracle
Pandora ~ miracle
LOVE ~ miracle

I was working in the basement yesterday and this song came on Pandora.
I have always loved it, and who doesn't love a miracle?
Here's the link: http://youtu.be/xKBttQmhDBw

Just so you know...
As I sit here writing about miracles, one of my favorite instrumentals ever comes on. "Surrender" by Solomon Keal. Click on the music tab, then click on the Pinterest tab. Go listen to it.
PS - you can search for it using ctrl f

There are millions of songs about love. Millions of pages in books. Millions of movie lines. Millions of poems.

Love sustains us and changes us and makes us crazy. I can recall, with a certain vividness, a crush from 1st grade on a boy who moved at the end of the year. Apparently, I have been in love with love for a long time.

There are so many different kinds of love.

You don't love pizza as much as your child. You don't love an inanimate object like you do a breathing object. But, you DO love it. Some days, you will love your dog/cat/fill in your animal, more than a family member because they cock their head in a certain way and never, ever have to get the last word in. You love your parents differently than your siblings; differently than your partner; differently than your kids. You fall in love. You fall out of love. With new people and sometimes with the same person over many years. You can love someone for a very long time, and although you still love them, you may no longer be "in love" with them. You may love someone with everything you have, but for whatever the reasons, you just can't be together. 

Love is the most powerful four letter word on the planet.

I read the Rumi quote and wonder if it's really true. What do YOU think?

I now know the videos don't show up on a phone. Here's the links.
I couldn't decide today, there are so many excellent songs.
http://youtu.be/8xg3vE8Ie_E  ß Love Story
http://youtu.be/mUFObCZtGWQ  ß She's In Love With The Boy

One of my FB friends put a Rick Warren quote up on her page today:

“Our culture has accepted two huge lies. The first is that if you disagree with someone’s lifestyle, you must fear or hate them. The second is that to love someone means you agree with everything they believe or do. Both are nonsense. You don’t have to compromise convictions to be compassionate."

Because of her beliefs, Prop. 8 and marriage equality is something she can't wrap her head around. I get it. And I truly appreciate her way of stating it. It isn't mean. It isn't degrading. It is HER belief system, and if I am going to write about love and acceptance, I need to love and accept her way of thinking.

I know. That's heady stuff. Especially in light of my blog post yesterday; I don't think I was on a rant. I was just stating my position. That's the beauty of a blog. You can do that sort of stuff.

If you are FB friends with me, yesterday, I wallpapered my wall with equal signs and notes about marriage equality. I didn't post anything offensive and I certainly don't shun those who don't think the way I do. These past two days are a walk in the park on FB compared to the political rants that happened pre-election, and in some cases, post election.

I am still firmly on the side of LOVE. And so, although I will never agree on all issues with everyone about everything, I do believe in love. And kindness. And mutual respect. If we just keep planting seeds of love we WILL grow a community of compassion and tolerance and amazingness.

Plant some love today, will you? It will make YOU happier.

Lyrics HERE ~ SO good

It is a beautiful March full moon.
This quote from February resonates perfectly for tonight.
"No matter what our differences are...we all look at the same moon."

If you've been reading my blog long enough, you know I fly on the side of love.

Today and tomorrow, the Supreme Court is hearing arguments about same-sex marriage. Forty-one states currently forbid it. Forbid. They forbid love.

This has been one of those arguments that makes me shake my head in wonder.

Because, really, if you want to get married, it will never be easy. It doesn't matter what your gender is. 

If you never shared a bedroom growing up, guess what, now you will. If you didn't go away to college and experience living with roommates, now you will. Shared bathroom time. Laundry. Parenting small people; who turn into big people. Religious, political, environmental, educational ideas that won't always mesh. Seriously.

Note the people who are "allowed" to get married, and how blissfully long they stayed married. 

Kim Kardashian. I will confess to watching these over-the-top nuptials with Bella. I was drawn in hook, line, and sinker. THIS is the woman young girls "look up to" and "admire?" She is currently a red-hot mess of pregnant with another man's baby while still married. NOT forbidden.

Katy and Russell. That was just odd. Now at least she is wide awake.

55 hours of marriage:
Britney Spears and Jason Alexander
9 days:
Dennis Rodman and Carmen Electra
18 days:
Mario Lopez and Ali Landry
107 days:
Nicolas Cage and Lisa Marie Presley
122 days:
Pamela Anderson and Kid Rock
225 days:
Renée Zellweger and Kenny Chesney

How many people do you know who have been married more than once? I was allowed to get married twice.

It doesn't list a gay couple. Because 41 states forbid them to marry. Who doesn't love NPH? Or Ellen? Or Anderson Cooper?

The shining light of the brilliant examples of who CAN get married fills me with an internal rage.

We are NOT born with the capacity to be prejudiced. We are taught it.

Can we please, please, please start teaching more about love?

This is a bonus blog post to celebrate my sister, Annemarie's 50th Birthday!

At her party on Saturday, the young adults couldn't get over our resemblance.

I've never thought we looked all that much alike. Um. Yeah we do.

We've always looked like sisters, but growing up we all looked very different. I had lighter brown hair and green eyes. Am had blonde hair and blue eyes. Jane had dark brown hair and brown eyes. Tom was a boy, with blonde hair and blue eyes. As we get older (and dye our hair various colors) we definitely look more and more alike.

Janie beat me to the punch with a fantastic FB post to Am just past midnight last night. So now I need to do my thing without stealing any of Jane's words. OH, the pressure! 

Annemarie was born 25 months after me. My life as an only child came to a crashing end; I don't remember any of it. Then, Jane joined us and suddenly Am came into her perfectly suited role in our family, the peacekeeper. Seriously. Look at her beautiful face. She is innately calm and kind, except of course, when she's not. 

This is hokey, but it's my blog, so I'm going for it:
A - Amazingly talented baker and cook. I always get a corner piece of cake when she cuts it. Bonus!
N - Nurturer. You can't have four kids in five years and not be a great nurturer. Until I had my own kids I really had no clue how she did it. I still don't. Each one of her kids is their own person. Beautiful. Brilliant. Funny. Very much like their mom. (Oh, OK, Ted's damn handsome and smart and funny too, but this is Am's post...)
N - Natural. You can't live on an organic farm for more than 25 years without being one with nature and the earth and products that are good for the environment and human alike.
E - Entertaining. Seriously. One of Am's classic statements, "I killed myself laughing!" She entertains herself an awful lot and the rest of us too.
M - Mother. That is the role that has defined her for almost half her life. As the mom of my first niece and first nephew and second niece and second nephew, all in a really quick period of time, the past 22 years have been about raising amazing people. And cats. Really. TOO many damn cats.
A - Academic. I know. It seems like a crazy adjective to use. BUT. This woman is frightening smart. Am was Wikipedia BEFORE Wikipedia was invented. Now, she may make stuff up. I'm not saying she does...but, she might.
R - Reader. Nobody reads as much as Am. Harlequin Romance novels are her favorites. Especially the Blaze series.
::: shaking my head as I write this; a family filled with romantics :::
I - Involved. Annemarie saw not one, but two, Girl Scout troops all the way through their Gold Awards. THIS IS HUGE. She is a gifted educator at the Cornell Cooperative.
E - Enchanting. There has always been something about Am that was princess-like  Maybe it was the blonde hair? Maybe it was the blue eyes? Maybe it was her innate ability to talk to animals? Maybe it was her ability to stop fights?

Life hasn't always been easy for Annemarie. She always smiles through the storms. She is a tremendous role model to me on how to raise fantastic people. She bakes THE best oatmeal rolls on the planet. She is generous. She is innately fantastic. She is, my sister.  xoxo

I think I've done a pretty good job here.  :-)

Please, join me in wishing Annemarie a tremendously happy 50th birthday. She'll love it. I promise.

On Saturday night, I had a dream that there was a baby girl (mine) on the floor of a church. I don't do dream interpretations, so I can't tell you what it means, except I thought it was odd. It was a blue eyed baby with light red hair; I was a green eyed baby with light red hair. My kids both have brown eyes. The fact that I remembered it was even more remarkable, as I do not remember my dreams. (And a church? WHAT?)

However, that's not the half of it. I woke up with the song "Lightening Crashes" in my head.

I heard it a few times this summer and looked up the lyrics; they're a little bizarre. In the premiere place to find information out, Wikipedia, I discovered the songwriter was really writing about the circle of life - how birth and death tend to go hand in hand.

Now, normally I wouldn't even write about this, BUT, Bella and I went to have lunch where Peter works. They had an excellent playlist streaming, so much so, that I pulled out Shazam to find out what we were listening to. Amy MacDonald, for the record. "Mr. Rock & Roll" and "This Is My Life." I never heard of her before today.

What song do you think came on while we were eating? Come on, guess.

YES. "Lightening Crashes."

Just so you know...

I have zero clue what this all means, but I figured I had best write about. Maybe one of you has a thought?

I was brought up in a Catholic household that shifted gears many times over the years.

We were introduced to many different factions of Christianity. We attended a variety of churches and chapels. We saw Godspell, a lot.

We were raised in a house with zero tolerance for bigotry.

We were taught to stand up for the underdog, to give what we could, to live with compassion, and to be feminists.

THE guiding factor in all of this? LOVE. It was and is the Buckley family religion. 

I have rarely participated in organized religion once I was able to make my own decisions. I made my communion at home. I don't recall ever going to confession. I wasn't confirmed. I had a marriage annulled. I was married in the church, my kids are baptized and have made all their sacraments. Their dad handled that. The minute they were confirmed they never wanted to step foot into the Catholic church again.

Last March my mom's best friend, Helen, died after a battle with cancer. Her funeral service was held at the Unitarian church she attended. Besides my father's funeral, which frankly, was epic, despite being held in a Catholic church, it was THE best funeral service I have ever been to. It was a celebration of Helen. It was a toast to the life of a woman who lived 82 years, raised 8 kids and loved to write novella's to various editors of newspapers. She was particularly fond of the NY Times. 

My mom misses Helen deeply. I perhaps should have noticed the passing of time with a phone call; but I don't ever remember death days. (Again, with the exception of my father who we buried on his 60th birthday.)

These two women were a force to be reckoned with. Helen taught religion at Holy Trinity High School; the irony of this is not lost on me. My parents taught values education out of our house. Our families were interconnected and spent days on end together as well as vacations and holidays. There was always music. Although we don't see each other with the frequency we did in our early teens, I can tell you that it is as if no time at all has passed when we get together.

Two single women, raising 12 kids between them. Having teens of my own now, I can't fathom how they did it. But they did. And really, the kids ARE alright. As an aside, the youngest kid is 41.

Their teaching to us remains firmly implanted in all of us. Love one another, even when it's hard. Be kind. Give what you can. Have faith. Laugh, a lot. White wine makes things better. (I had to...) Sing. Dance. Rejoice in the day. Be the best you you can be.

In honor of both my Mama and Helen (I don't know quite how this post turned out this way, but I like it) I am posting the video I received this morning on my FB wall from my friend Lisa.

It is the perfect Sunday sermon.

Today, I will pack a lunch for the first lacrosse scrimmage of the season.

Then, I will celebrate my sister Annemarie's 50th birthday. I will see my nieces and nephews and eat divine cake. I will thoroughly enjoy the price of gas in New Jersey. And I will create while driving in the quiet of my car.

Enjoy your Saturday!

Music - gorgeous instrumental I have on my playlist.

I wish I had a copy of the Myers Briggs tests I took in my youth. I would bet a zillion dollars they would have all pointed me towards the work I am doing now. Or a nurse. I would have been an awesome nurse if not for those pesky science courses. (Although I did rock a "B" in Anatomy & Physiology as an adult.) But I digress...

Sometimes, in order to get to where you are most alive, you have to take a pretty circuitous route. Sometimes golden/silver/bronze handcuffs get in the way. Sometimes you don't know who you want to be until you've raised your kids to an age that you're pretty sure they could survive a really nice dinner party without a manners intervention. Sometimes it takes a crisis. Sometimes it takes getting laid off.

All I know is that when you get there; you know it.

I have been doing the work of TGHR for more than 12 years. It was just under the umbrella of another name and it was making money for other people. Not for me.

Last night I attended a Girls Night Out that was hosted by the incomparable Tara Colavecchio, owner of Dragonfly Hair Studio in Peekskill, NY. It was marvelous to meet so many people interested in what I have to offer. I hobnobbed with healers, psychics, astrologers, renowned jewelry makers, old friends (Pat!) and new friends. I had a grand time and was very excited to share my vision of what I expect to happen at TGHR.

Click HERE for the schedule of classes happening at TGHR. Further details of the classes will happen by Monday.

And hey (!) ~ are YOU alive in your work? Do share!

Music today...well, the word "alive" put me right here. Welcome to 1985.

As we head into the first full day of spring I am filled with gladness that it will soon be light enough and warm enough to walk the river in the morning. Yes, I will still go to the gym, but I really do need that river.

I have been known to seek out the opinions of others. (Find me someone who doesn't and I will be duly impressed.) I like to run stuff by people and see what they think.

I have a friend who I firmly believe was my "life sponsor" for several months. One of their most admirable skills is as a tremendous listener. As a result, I could (and did) go on and on and on about my thoughts and ideas. My friend would interject when something really struck a chord, always with sage and useful advice. My friend also shut me down when I got down on myself. Because I truly respect them, and their life experiences, it allowed me to actually inspire myself.

I think I listen to myself pretty well. I listen when the self talk is lovely and when it turns to stinkin' thinkin', which is never a good thing. So, if I can be still, if I take the time to journal, if I can take the 16 minutes to meditate, if I can elliptical to nowhere for a while, I can shut myself up and inspire myself.

What do YOU do to inspire yourself? Maybe we can come up with some good strategies to help ourselves.

I love finding these relatively unknown songs that I end up really enjoying.

I did a google search for songs with stars in them. There are literally hundreds. Do you know how many versions of "When the Stars Go Blue" there are? A lot. And then I couldn't decide which one to use? Because let's face, Don McLeans's "Vincent (Starry, Starry Night)" is what popped into my head first. So today, I take on the role of VJ (a la MTV) and present you three videos. Listen to them when you can; you'll like them.

I believe, this is much harder to do than it seems it ought to be. I just need to look in my closet. Black, black, and more black. A touch of red. An occasional burst of color.

I live in the land of skinny jeans, North Face jackets and UGGS. Straightened hair. Salads. Manicures.

I don't own skinny jeans and now that I have discovered yoga pants, well, you can only imagine how little I need skinny jeans.

My kids have North Face jackets. I took the Old Navy fleece Peter was given for Christmas two years ago and made it mine.

Nope...I don't have UGGS. I rock my Merrill clogs like nobody's business. And I did buy a kicking pair of suede over the knee boots I wore to LIVE last week. The thought of putting them on again pains me...

Up until I got pregnant, I had pin straight hair. Then, I apparently had a permanent hormonal imbalance that resulted in some wonky pregnancy "wave" that needs to be hit with the brush when I blow dry my hair. I am OK with the use of the straightener, but since it belongs to Bella, "WHY ARE YOU USING MY STRAIGHTENER?!!!" (um, because I bought it?), I tend to not even bother. Plus, my hair is frequently in a pony tail.

OK, I do eat a lot of salads. I am a cuticle biter (I know, I know...) so I do indulge in a manicure once in a while and I adore a pedicure.

So how do I remain unique? How do I not conform? How do I swim out of my own pond? 

I would say opening TGHR was a pretty unique venture. It is not your typical new business. 

I try not to worry or wonder or frankly, even care what anyone thinks about me. The human being in me has a hard time with that.

I conform when it suits me. 

I like black. I like to paint my toenails black and right now, even my fingernails are a very dark gray. My new RAV4 is black. 

I toy every now and then with changing THIS very website to a black background rather than white. (Perhaps I'll do it for a week and then survey which you like better?)

I read books based on what the masses suggest. Sometimes, I get the book first and suggest it to the masses.

I love music of almost every genre. But if my teen suggests something not on my typical playlist, I will give it a listen.

I do not partake in scary: movies, TV, books. Romance, comedy, the occasional drama. Oh, musicals. I adore musicals.

So? What makes YOU stand out? Do you get out of your pond? Please share!

I listened to a bunch of versions of this song, and this one made me clap.

LIVE was a tremendous success!

My co-chairs and I, Amy & Jen, midway through the night. We had such a blast.

We are all still reeling in the headiness of it. The venue was gorgeous. The music rocked the house. Thank you a million time to the amazing, talented, Jimmy Dee Music, Westchester's Best of 2012 Wedding Providers (or something of that magnitude - it's on their homepage, check them out!). The casino tables were full on busy. The prizes were out of this world.

The feedback is incredibly favorable, so favorable that, yes, even I conceded we HAVE to do it again next year. The people who know me and read this blog are not that surprised...

This is a bit of an exaggeration  To the best of my knowledge no one has ever danced on a table at a LIVE event...but hey, there is always tonight.

Our event, which I believe I may have mentioned, oh, a few times, is a culmination of months and months of work. We literally start planning next years event while we are in the midst of this years; especially if something doesn't go quite the way we had anticipated it would.

We provide the community a wedding without a bride and groom. Seriously.

It is for the kids, or as Tracy says, "It is for the CHILL-dren." 

It is for the adults to enjoy a fun night out. You spend a few hundred dollars in tough economic times to help your community. To express pride in your school district. To toast each other for being nearly done with the school year. 

You may win big at the gaming tables. You may lose. You may win the coveted seats to graduation with the even more coveted preferred parking space. Or maybe you win the tickets to see LIVE with Kelly & Michael. Or a week of dinners out. Or a beauty basket. Or a round of golf for four.

Then again, you may not win a blessed prize, but, since everyone gets a favor (I told you, it's a wedding) you don't leave empty handed.  It is THE place to be tonight. I know this because we had people RSVPing at ten o'clock last night AFTER we had all the tables figured out.

I mentioned the amazing committee in yesterday's post. 

Here's to us. May it be our best year yet.

Now...let's dance!

Yesterday, my friend Janis colored my hair for me. She is following her dream, to be a hairdresser, many years after she first longed to do so. So, my color is fresh, I got low lights for the first time in nine year AND, I had a great day visiting with her while at the beauty school.

Janis is definitely one of the women in my life who always lifts me higher.

Here's the most amazing part of yesterday. I was parked in a two-hour spot. I was at the location for almost 7 hours. (They're learning; it takes a long time!) I only put in enough quarters for two hours. I knew I would have a ticket. KNEW IT. We SAW the cops making their rounds. I got to my RAV4 - NO TICKET! Plus, there was 1:29 left on the meter. A gigantic THANK YOU to whomever my Random Act of Kindness angel was.

In addition, I am surrounded by amazing women on the committee I co-chair for our district-wide fundraiser tomorrow. Feel free to click on the link and take a gander. I know you'll be impressed.

It is nearly "Go Time" and as a result, we are all a little crazy. I gave up a ton of responsibility this year. The women who are running with it are doing an outstanding job; are we all a little unnerved? Yup. (That's our word of the day. And motherfucker... I'm just sharing...) But, in a strange way, we ARE all remarkably calm.

We have a ton of awesome prizes. We have a ton of amazing sponsors. We have a ton of people coming - over 330! 

It's all good. It's all for a great cause. And by working well together, we are helping each others beings.

Just so you know...

Oprah's words totally put this song in my head. My daughter introduced me to it. It remains a true favorite of mine.