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Stand In Your Truth

12/13/2016

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Artwork: Anahata Katkin - anahataart.com
If you’ve been paying attention here, you know I've been in fabulous therapy for the past four years. Not deep, intensive, bone crushing, teeth gnashing, wringing of the hands therapy - that shit was done about two years ago. Now I go for periodic tune ups. A little Reiki, a little chat, a hug at the end. 

I have learned any number of things:
  • breathe
  • journal (ugh...again...really?!)
  • crying will not kill me
  • what someone thinks about me is none of my business
  • breathe
  • what makes (insert a situation) this about me
  • why do I feel that way
  • what can I do to turn things around
  • I don't have to make any changes until I'm damn good and ready
  • oh, did I mention, breathe

All of this is helpful in life - with family, friends, acquaintances and co-workers. 

I have been involved in some sticky situations this year which have made me feel as if my character was assassinated.

I try to remember behind every negative there is always a grain of truth. I have sat with the barbs and I have taken the time to figure out where the kernel of truth is. (That might involve teeth gnashing. I'm just saying...)

I do know my greatest assets will be my greatest liabilities. Ying and yang and all that jazz.

So, If I stand in MY truth and I stay true to my core beliefs, values and way of going about living my life it allows the unsettled feelings to give way to a clearer state of mind.

At my age I realize not everyone is going to like me. I'm generally OK with that. (We all want to be liked, let's face it.) There is freedom in knowing that. It allows me to stay strong in the face of negativity and remind myself I am perfectly imperfect.

I chose to spend time with the people who WANT to be with me. It's much better for my peace of mind.

Here's to all of us, look at us, standing in our truth.

​xo

PS - The Voice finale last night. Wé nailed this and I love that it happened to fit in perfectly with my topic today.
Don't tell me not to live,
Just sit and putter,
Lifes candy and the suns
A ball of butter.
Don't bring around a cloud
To rain on my parade.

https://youtu.be/RCy4-2QQw-I
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Dancing Out the Building

12/9/2016

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I am actually off tomorrow. I know, a Saturday in December - how delicious!

Perhaps I will grand jete out of the salon tonight much like the dude soaring into the elevator.

How it is I never used this song before is amazing. I confess to watching the Vanilla Ice Project on the DIY network and humming this song at odd times randomly throughout the years.

As Rob, AKA Vanilla Ice says, "
Dance, go rush the speaker that booms!"

xo
Yo, man, let's get out of here! Word to your mother!

https://youtu.be/1hJiQT2pVH0
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Shut Up and Dance

12/2/2016

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Ah Friday.

The last day of the work week for everyone except:
  • hair salons
  • nail salons
  • spas
  • first responders
  • nurses
  • doctors
  • hospital staff
  • liquor stores (ha!)
  •   (fill in the blank with another profession)  
At any given time in the salon, depending on who took control of the music that day, there is at least one song that comes on that's a dance song. And so, of course, we dance.

OK, it's really just a few of us - but we have fun when we do. It gives you a few seconds reprieve from everything else that is going on and makes people smile.

Apparently, my sister Jane danced from "Color World" to the sinks yesterday. No one was surprised and they were happy to share that with me - peas in a pod and all.

So, on this Friday, after some seriously tumlutous times, take a few minutes to shut up and dance!

xo
Oh don't you dare look back
Just keep your eyes on me.
I said you're holding back,
She said shut up and dance with me!

https://youtu.be/6JCLY0Rlx6Q
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February 2017 RETREAT!

11/28/2016

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If you go back to the beginning of this blog, one of the things I have always written about is wanting to host an overnight retreat.

Always.

And like humans everywhere, I made a million excuses on why that couldn't happen. Most of them nonsense. (Sound vaguely familiar?)

Well, no more my friends!

Kacey and I have teamed to create the retreat of our dreams. (I am so not kidding!)

To make things incredibly special, Regina Bei, who owns the Hudson House Inn in Cold Spring, has blocked the entire inn for the weekend guaranteeing us a most magical time.

What else could you possibly have to do the first weekend in February? Watch Netflix? Laundry? Crock pot a meal? Nestle under blankies?

Imagine being right beside the Hudson River in a bucolic setting with a fire roaring and some of your favorite new friends making space for you and allowing you to just be.
(You're imagining it, right?)

Imagine us creating a weekend that expands on our day events.
(You've asked us to do this...)

Imagine delicious, nutritious foods.
(That you didn't have to prepare.)

Imagine the gift you can give yourself. Because if you don't put the oxygen mask on yourself first you will be of no service to anyone.
(There's a reason airlines tell us this!)

Join us.

​Details HERE.

xo
(dreaming) So quiet and peaceful
(dreaming) Tranquil and blissful
(dreaming) There's a kind of magic in the air
(dreaming) What a truly magnificient view
(dreaming) A breathtaking scene
With the dreams of the world in the palm of your hand

https://youtu.be/CjWQZBmJf6M
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My Friend, Glennon

11/6/2016

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I can and have waxed poetic about in 11 posts about how Glennon Doyle Melton has inspired me on this blog. All you have to do is use the search button up there on the top right and you will find all the archives.

My sister Jane and I went to see her at BAM (Brooklyn Academy of Music) in October. BUT, it wasn't just Glennon. It was an evening of Women Warriors inspiring an audience of rapt listeners at the Together Tour. Truth tellers sharing bits of their lives that matter.

I invite you to check these astounding women out:
Valerie Kaur ~ Dr. Jacqui Lewis ~ Seane Corne ~ Alicia Keys

BUT, today. This morning. I am on Kacey's show chatting with her about my friend, Glennon after she interviewed her.
::: insert hyper ventilating :::
KACEY INTERVIEWED GLENNON
​
https://soundcloud.com/kacey-mo-grean/love-warrior-glennon-doyle-melton-and-maggie
Some day I will be sitting on a couch with Glennon shoulder to shoulder. It's a promise to myself. I really would lose my one mind with the wonder of that.

THIS coming Wednesday, Glennon is launching her annual "Healing Hands" event to raise money to raise people up. It's one of my favorite feel good events of the year. I urge you to check it out.

At the end of the night, after tears were shed, and manifestos were written and after they were supposed to be done, Alicia Keys was moved to sing this song acappella.
​
​NOT A SOUND COULD BE HEARD EXCEPT HER VOICE.
I took the above video from YouTube as I was completely caught up in the moment and didn't have it in me to video. So, thank you to the wonderful person who got all this.

Below is the studio version. Go buy it.
Oh maybe we should love somebody
Oh maybe we could care a little more
So maybe we should love somebody
Instead of polishing the bombs of holy war

https://youtu.be/3NwLTltmkoo
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Listening to Our Yes

4/25/2016

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 Yesterday, an awe inspiring group of women gathered at the Chuang Yen Monastery in Kent, New York. It is the second time we met there and it was even more magical than last year.

GIANT, huge thanks to Barbara for being our unofficial, official photographer. What a gift. All love, darling.

We gathered in the parking lot - I had my banner hanging on my car so people would know where we were. There were quite a few new women to our event as well as women who have shared each and every event and a few in-between.

We walked up to the Great Buddha Hall. We gathered in a grassy field where we held hands (you're welcome, Maria) and introduced ourselves. The energy was absolutely extraordinary. I wish some kind soul had gotten a picture of that moment - more than 20 women, many strangers, holding hands and sharing the energy of love.

​As always, Demitra led us in a moving blessing.
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From the circle of women (join our page on FB) we each gathered three stones, or rocks, or quasi boulders, and walked in silence to the Lady of the Lake. Kwan Yin holds court there.
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We circled around Kwan Yin. I read this poem. It was the inspiration for the day. I first heard it at the Glennon Doyle Melton event I attended in February.
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The purpose of the three stones was so that we could state three things we were going to say yes to. We would throw our stones into the water while we cheered each woman with the word "yes" each time she tossed (hurled) her stones. There's power in women collectively chanting the word "yes" many, many times. Kacey started us off and from there we bore witness to the beauty and majesty of each woman's yeses.
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Yes! Yes! Yes!
From the lake we strolled over to the gazebos where the ever amazing Demitra shared how our astrological signs help us to say yes to what matters to us. I have no photo documentation of that so imagine all of us sitting together listening in rapt attention as Dee delighted us with her insight.

This was a free event. However, it was a tailgate vegetarian pot luck lunch at the end of the walks and talks.
​
Women + food = abundance.

Whenever two or more are gathered in his/her name, there IS love.
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OH! The colors!
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After we had cleaned and packed the cars up we took a moment to take this photo. When I looked at it this morning I wept. With joy and love and gratitude. The three of us work so organically well together. THIS is what love looks like.
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Kacey with her "on the go" altar. Of course I had mine too - set up in the back of my Jeep. So often we think alike.
I went up to the Great Buddha Hall to finish the event quietly in my head and think about all that had been shared. Unbeknownst to me, Barbara took this picture.
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Such a blessed day. Grateful.
At every event there is a playlist. Imagine my sincere, total, and sheer delight when I realized MCC had a new album coming out and this song was already available. Music played during our meal.

Until next time.

​xo
Here's a map I've memorized of
Everywhere I've ever been.
And the faces of everyone I've
Loved and left to try again
I couldn't make out
what they were saying
So instead I listened hard to what's inside
What else are there but
the voice in your heart?
Something tamed
something wild

https://youtu.be/MkPfHoT5Vc0
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An Evening with Glennon Doyle Melton

2/4/2016

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If you've been around here a while, you must have figured out I love Glennon Doyle Melton. I can't even remember how long ago I discovered her, but I do know that what she writes and says is important and needs to be read. Her truth telling is my truth telling.

Back in October I got an email stating she would be speaking at St. Paul's Chapel in February. I didn't even think about it, I went directly to the link and bought myself a ticket. 

For many, many years I passed St. Paul's on my way to 140 West Street. It is sacred, holy ground. It has comforted thousands of people over the years. The pews wore out from the masses of first responders who took respite there after 9/11 and as a result, there are none. At night, they open the church to allow the homeless to sleep on the floor. Together Rising, G's not for profit, donated money for 500 meals last night.

My relationship with faith is always a giant question mark. Glennon's is an out in the open love affair with God because He loves her NO MATTER WHAT. I think my relationship with faith has gotten onto much stabler ground having found G.
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Click on the picture for the book link
Glennon's writing is raw and powerful. I can't recommend her book enough. In person she is exactly the same, EXCEPT, you get to see her facial expressions and hear her voice as she tells her stories. She is mesmerizing.

Having read everything she's written and watched her TED Talk, I knew I could expect the greatness and it was all that and more.

For instance, in my words:
  • Pain and grief are something to embrace, for out of pain there is usually some profound growth. Rather than push it away, take it in and feel.
  • If we envy something, perhaps that is our inner compass pointing us to our true north of what we want to do with our lives.
  • If our heart breaks about something, perhaps that is where we should put our energies to make our hearts break less.
Last night we had the honor of meeting Amanda Doyle, best known as Sister. At the end of her talk, a question from the audience showed us the grace that happens when you are both the addict and the person who loves the addict. Sister said (paraphrasing here) "...getting Glennon back was a miracle. I held space for her and when she was ready to come back, I could continue to love her."

I sat next to a lovely woman named Amy who also came solo. She is a mom of young kids, including a two year old who isn't sleeping through the night. She gifted herself a night in a hotel for a full nights rest. She was headed there after going to meet a dear friend.

If your favorite author comes to town and you get a chance to hear them, meet them, listen to them, as part of a collective group of humanity, do so.

I've been saying "Love Wins" for years. Last night, I got to meet the woman who lives it.

​xo
We believe Your love is the strongest way
You’re tearing down walls and You break our chains
Even in this darkness hope will rise again
When we lay down our weapons we will let love win

​https://youtu.be/SKWm0bGZlDU
​
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And Then They Were Gone

1/20/2016

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 I am going to state for the record I like an empty nest. Quite a few of my friends don't embrace it as wholeheartedly as I do.

I like everything staying where I put it. I like my mess being my mess. I like not having to be concerned about dinner. I like small amounts of laundry.

With that said, I love when the kids ARE home. I love their friends. I love the gatherings.

And, last Wednesday when Peter went back it was the first time since he went to college that I cried a little when he left. Not because I was sad, quite the opposite, I am so proud of this kid. I like him. He's a kind, considerate, fun person. He plays baseball so I probably won't see him again until May. Unless I go to a game... That's a long time to not see him live and in person.

On Monday night I dropped Bella back off. I talk to her all the time - via text, email, FB messages and calls. I am still the chauffeur, so I didn't shed tears. She too is growing, and changing, and finding her way and it isn't always easy. I am so proud of how she is handling what life is throwing at her. She'll be back in March.

While all of that was happening, so too was the death of many amazing and talented people in the arts. Their gifts are numerous and the beauty of their occupation is they do kind of live on forever. I have devoured articles, quotes, and tweets. I have watched videos galore about everyone who has died. I have learned more about David Bowie than I ever thought I cared to know about. I loved this, written by Marc Elliot on cnn.com about Glenn Frey:
When we mourn for Frey, are we mourning our lost selves and a time when we all thought we could live hard and stay free and surf and bike and run and jump and love and never lose because we were forever young?
I am a witness to each death. I listened to the music. I watched the movies. And in some way, I mourn for each bright star that is now shining in the heavens rather than here on earth.

The Eagles truly defined years of my life. YEARS. I wonder what music will be my kids soundtracks when they are adults? Peter's will probably be a country rap. Bella will embrace all things alternative.

I remember singing this song. LOUDLY. Mostly with Carolyn and Heidi. Feel free to sing along if you're so inclined.

​xo
Just remember this, my girl, when you look up in the sky 
You can see the stars and still not see the light (that's right) 

​https://youtu.be/JoGweOFqapU
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Water, Water Everywhere

1/11/2016

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the aftermath...
I was working at the salon last Wednesday when I got a phone call from Bella on my cell. She told me water was coming out of the ceiling fan in the dining room, out of an outlet in the dining room, through the walls to the den and into the basement.

I must give a shout out to my kids who handled this along with their friend Corey - who is directly responsible for them even finding the leaks as he didn't close the front door and Bella went out to see what was going on and came upon the water show happening in the dining room. They pulled the towels and garbage bags and got to work in a hurry!

I left the salon in a flash in the very capable hands of the people who work there and found the towels and garbage pails of the house strategically placed under drips.
​

I placed an urgent request on Facebook for plumbers and soon had a whole list of names. The plumber we used lives very close by and was at the house in a matter of minutes.
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::: sigh :::
Jim the plumber located the problem, that teensy little pipe that froze and exploded in a baseboard in my closet. He had it fixed within 20 minutes.

Meanwhile, a friend sent me this:
Hi Maggie! Sounds like you need to order in dinner and open a bottle of wine....can I send you pizza ?

HOW sweet was that? I took her up on her offer. I went back to the salon to close out, the pizza was delivered, Liberty Mutual was called and it was arranged that the "clean up crew" would come first thing in the morning.

At 8:00 on Thursday morning Rytech showed up and using a reciprocating saw cut open the PLASTER (yeah!) ceiling and walls and pulled down the ceiling tiles in the den. They ran five loud fans upstairs and downstairs and hooked up two ginormous humidifiers. The one in the closet made the upstairs so hot I ran the A/C so I could sleep. (This is comedy.) They came at 9:00 this morning to take back all the loud equipment. I did tell them the mess they left before leaving was too much. He apologized, but really, do you think he even cares? I doubt it, he has other homes to get to.

AND, because life is perfect, on Friday I spoke to Kacey's husband Mike about fixing up this horror show. He is a brilliant contractor. 
Kacey's dad Moe helped build this house when it was first built; we've come full circle. I will look forward to no holes in the house.

So...how was YOUR week?!

​xo
Handel's Water Music because at least it should SOUND pretty!

https://youtu.be/uCD0GLyYJEI
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Happy New Year ~ 2016

1/1/2016

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So, on Tuesday, I totally forgot to mention that I had an idyllic Christmas. As close to Currier & Ives as ever. I think it was because I gave up the expectations of perfection and went with a more que sera sera attitude. As a result, this holiday season has been pretty wonderful.

This picture was taken at The Buckley Family Christmas at my sister Jane's house on Sunday. Peter looks darn studious in his glasses - his eyes burned after a PS4 marathon from Christmas night until 10:00AM the 26. Ah, youth...
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It helped that six weeks prior to Christmas Day a small group of women gathered under the gentle guidance of the amazing Cathy Anesi to support each other through the typical madness and mayhem that is Thanksgiving through New Year's. The timing of the group was impeccable (well played, Cathy) and the women were marvelous. On our last visit before the new year we went over what we were grateful for in 2015. Coincidentally, I just so happened to have this delightful pad to share with the women. The link to get one for yourself, or any of her other Gratipads is available by clicking on the picture.
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We have had days of visiting with family and with friends. We celebrated NYE as we have done for the past 8 years with dear friends.

The kids had their own event at our house. The Magic Basement was converted from a place of la-la to a Scattagories and a Pong Tournament space. I woke up this morning to bodies sleeping on every couch and chair in the house. I am grateful my kids are happy to be here, their friends are happy to be here and that they are responsible enough to sleep here and then head en masse to the diner for breakfast/lunch/whatever.
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As you may (or may not) recall I had the great Stampin' Up! purge from the Magic Basement nearly two years ago. I got rid of so many crafting supplies I could have honestly opened my own store. I have been trying to keep up the purging and have been fairly successful. A lot of stuff from the kids playroom (yes, it's still called the playroom) was upcycled to a local nursery school. A massive amount of stuff was thrown out. Peter is moving into a house next year and so, there is a garage full of things for he and his buddies to load onto a U-Haul and be quasi set.

Another thing I am doing is getting rid of the hundreds of CDs I have collected over the years and frankly, not listened to in probably five years. Pandora and iTunes allow me to customize what I love and listen to, so why take up all the space of CDs. Enter the app, decluttr. Using your phone, you scan in the bar codes from your music CDs, games and movies, and they tell you what they will pay you. You box it. You print a shipping label - THEY PAY FOR SHIPPING (!), and then you bring it to your local UPS store. How convenient that my local store is four doors down from the salon. THEN, they send you a check. Sweet Baby James, I don't care that it's an average of 0.3¢ per CD. That's more than I got for them just sitting here gathering dust. I still need to figure out what to do with the CDs that don't have bar codes or that they don't take, but in the meantime I am delighted to be down 237 CDs and counting.

There is a great blog piece I came across last week entitled 200 Things to Throw Away. It's not a scary list at all. I took a look at it and I have begun and/or have done an awful lot that is on the list already. Since it's the first of the year, I thought I would share it. We'll compare notes NEXT January to see how we all did.

I am reading Shonda Rhime's tremendous book Year of Yes. Her writing is as amusing and genius as her TV shows. It is THE perfect book to start the New Year off on. Slay your dragons, kiss away your fears and just say yes to that which scares you. I highly recommend it.

I am not a resolution maker. I never have been. I do set intentions now and again. And I write stuff down because frankly, once it's "out there" in the universe I can just wait for stuff to happen. I am realistic enough to know I have to work hard too. I think hard work coupled with a purpose is a powerful combination.

Here's to 2016. May it be magical. May it be abundant. May it keep bodies and minds healthy. And may love be the strongest force we share. I look forward to greater connections and lots of inspiration from the people I learn from. May your inner light shine bright.

xo
I love this duo. Their music is so gorgeously soothing.
​
https://youtu.be/vKx7Sg-bYv0
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And...I'm Back (kind of)

12/29/2015

4 Comments

 
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My last post to this blog was in August. Why? Life.

The salon requires a lot of time and attention. Nothing extraordinary, no more than what a million other people do every day, BUT, there are 16 people who need to be paid, and that takes the priority over TGHR. My brain simply couldn't handle the salon and the need/want to write.

In other news, the world has gone crazy.

For the record, in my opinion: ALL LIVES MATTER.
Love should win. Always.

It's an election year and so that means I take major breaks from Facebook because I. Just. Can't.

Except for Candy Crush. I have an addictive personality (Really? You're shocked?) and this remains my latest addiction.

HGTV and I are one. Jonathon, Drew, Chip, Joanna, Hilary, David, Jillian, Todd and the voice from House Hunters - any version - are almost always what's on my TV.

Except during The Voice. HOLY Jordan Smith and the entire supremely talented group of contestants. WHAT a season. (It returns in February, thank you very much.)

I experienced empty nest and for the record, love it. I like being responsible for me. I like not having to wonder where things are - they remain where I leave them. If I make a mess, it's my mess. If I want dinner, I eat. If not, I don't.

BUT.
but...
There was a VERY different transition to college from my experience with Peter to my experience with Bella. Much of what transpired is not for me to share. That said, it took me many, many weeks to realize that just like when she was a little girl, she needed me to be her mom. To listen. To listen hard. To not offer up too much advice. I couldn't get in the car and go to Vermont. Five hours is a long ride. I have only done it in one day once and that was when she was coming home for Thanksgiving. The kid needed to be home and in her own bed. 

On the way home that Friday before Thanksgiving, about an hour and a half in, this precious young woman I adore so much said, "I might have exaggerated just a little bit about how bad it was."

All I felt was relief. Pure, unadulterated relief.

She needed the week home.

And then, she was gone. Back to UVM to do her thing.

Today, my cherubs have been home for about two weeks. The house has been filled with the laughter and voices and giant shoes of their many friends.

They are both working during the break. Peter heads back up to Rochester on the 13th courtesy of his gas guzzling truck. I will bring Bella up on the 18th.

And the semester will be fantastic. For both of us. Because we finally got this stuff figured out.

So. That's me in a nutshell. What's been happening with you?
You will always be my girl
You will always be, you will always be
You will always be my girl

https://youtu.be/N4GYqDfOzMA
4 Comments

Time With Myself & My Kids

8/18/2015

2 Comments

 
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Lately, I have been spending time with myself.

Watching copious amounts of HGTV, the Food Network, DIY, and TLC. I flip back and forth between the channels like a kid strung out on sugar.

I have read a lot of books. Mostly fluff.

I have spent time in my head, endlessly trying to determine, what comes next? Since that is the question that flummoxes me the most, I ignore it and carry on.

I have been spending time with Peter. My eldest amuses me to no end. He is hilariously funny and righteously serious. He quotes Donald Trump to me and probably counts down backwards from "1" to see how fast it take me to turn around and slap him. He has worked very hard this summer and has saved up a tidy amount towards his own savings account. He has taken a few moments here and there to at least make some of his own fabulous memories this summer.

I have been spending time with Bella - doing the requisite shopping for college that seems to never end. Just when you think you're done, you remember something else to add to the pile. Bella was born curious. She has a twinkle in her eye, a spring in her step, and a song in her heart. She is our family comedian and I know I will miss her banter. 

For instance, just yesterday she was saying something to Peter involving medicine. He was dissing her. Her response, "Peter, I am watching Gray's Anatomy these days. I am THAT MUCH closer to a doctor than ever." Our friend Mary was in the house so we have a witnesses to this madness.

That's what I will miss. 

I watch these two people and I am so proud. They are remarkable people. I like them. I want to be around them - except of course when I don't...

As they get ready to leave for their respective college experiences I marvel at their confidence. I think to myself, "We did that." We gave them the soft place to land so they could explore, be courageous, be brave, and live life to it's fullest.

I know from this past year when they leave, it is quiet. When they come back, it is loud, and messy, and laughter filled. Friends gather and visit. 

With both of them gone, it will be doubly quiet.

I won't have to worry (not that I do as Bella will attest to) about what's for dinner. Cold cuts will last a day more. A gallon of milk will last ten days. Ben & Jerry's Phish Food will not have to be labeled with duct tape and a sharpie so as to make sure the right person's ice cream stays frozen. (Seriously.)

But the wings they are growing.
Oh.
My.
God.

They make ME soar.

These two kids of mine make me proud. They make me stare and marvel at the magnificence of the humans we have created. They are the best of us and of course, the worst of us, and boy, oh, boy, they are truly something.

When I read the longings of my friends as their kids fly the nest and head off on their next big adventure, I appreciate it. I get it.

But I don't follow that same thought process. I want and need them to go forth and take on the world. (And I do know my friends who are missing their kids want the same thing!)

I applaud, wish them well, and know I've got their backs - no matter what, no matter where, no matter how.

xo
It's like a symphony just keep listening
And pretty soon you'll start to figure out your part
Everyone plays a piece and there are melodies
In each one of us, oh, it's glorious

https://youtu.be/nomxXk6Q1rk
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Life 101

7/22/2015

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image: http://bit.ly/tghr2015720

I started writing this before receiving Bella's phone call. That'll teach me to think life is calming down...

You may have noticed I have taken a "leave" from blogging in 2015. And from posting on Facebook. It wasn't intentional. 

In all it's crazy glory, I have been living life.

I can't even pinpoint a specific time when I decided to sort of, kind of, go off the grid.

These days, I basically stalk FB, Twitter and Instagram. When there is something that moves me, I share it.

In the beginning of this journey, I  had A LOT to say. No one wants to read the same blah-blah-blah from a writer day in and day out and I felt like I was getting to that point. It seemed like it was time to recharge.

So?
What's been going on here at TGHR?

Peter finished up his first year at college. I barely see him. He is working like a dog, playing baseball AND softball, going to the gym nearly every day and taking in a Yankee game when he can.

Bella graduated high school. She went on a 10 day adventure to Costa Rica where she was eaten alive by many bugs. In spite of the mud and bugs, she had a wonderful time and frankly, her texts made for fabulous entertainment. Yes, she would go again, but to the resorts on the Caribbean side.

The salon has converted from paper to a computerized environment. It has been a task. We convinced Linda (via texts, video and general stalking) to get us up and running and between the two of us we were finally sailing smoothly by Saturday. Once we get it figured out even further, our clients will be able to book appointments via the app. But first, we need to figure out how to do it 100% correctly ourselves.

We also hired Janis, my co-president of the PTA and my dear friend. I had been asking her to come to Backstage since she was in school and I didn't even own the salon. To say I am thrilled would be an understatement. She has no idea how much I have been watching her and listening to her as she speaks to her clients. She is a special woman with tremendous skills. Sit in her chair and you will feel and see what I do.

Throughout all of these processes I totally lost my one mind one morning. If you looked at me, I cried. I couldn't even begin to tell you why. All I knew was that I HAD TO GET OUT. Right then. Right there. THAT SECOND. Thankfully, Leslie was able to sit at the front desk and I left for 90 minutes. I walked the river. I texted my therapist - because let's face it, when the ship is sinking, you need someone who knows you and makes sure you really ARE breathing. In the weeks since that particular episode I have been "working" on continuing to get my shit together. This stuff takes time.

When it rains it pours and so, last week we had to have all of our kitchen appliances replaced. I checked pieces out last year and couldn't justify the price just because the stove top wasn't working and maybe the dishwasher leaked. However, when Peter announced the ice cream had turned to soft serve I knew it was time to take action. The kitchen has moved into 2015 with stainless steel and a stove top that has every burner working. It's a nice change. Plus, the dishwasher is so quiet you don't even know it's on even when you are standing right next to it! THAT alone is worth the payments. I have also been assured by the salesperson that my electric bill will go down since they are that much more efficient.

I have been reading like a fiend. I haven't even updated my Goodreads account which is rather stupid on my part as I never can remember what I read. With that said, I have read several stand outs.
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How Yoga Works is a book I have been savoring. I read a couple of chapters at a time and then I put it down for a while. I truly don't want it to end. I "get" something with each read. 

Born With Teeth is Kate Mulgrew's memoir. Each chapter is filled with anecdotes that make you smirk, cry or laugh. It is so well written; I flew through it.

I just read The Seven Sisters. Oh, my anthology loving friends, I am SO excited because this is going to be a long running series. Naturally that means I am chomping at the bit for the next book to come out already! It is so well crafted.

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I did go see the movie Pitch Perfect 2 and I smiled throughout the whole thing. And I cried, because you know, you have to. I think Bella saw it at least three times. I am waiting for it to come out on DVD so I can watch the original and this one in one sitting.

I love podcasts. Seriously. I can listen and work at the same time. My favorite is the Dear Sugar podcasts with Cheryl Strayed and Steve Almond. (You also can find them on iTunes.) I LOVED Tiny, Beautiful Things, Strayed's book - it will go down as one of my top 100 books ever.

I read many astoundingly fabulous blogs. Heather Armstong wrote a magnificent piece on her blog, dooce.com - it will wreck you in the best way. When you have to say goodbye to a beloved pet. You will need a bucket of tissues. Her follow-up piece is equally beautiful. Photo credit of her dog Chuck to Heather.

Over the weekend I was looking at my friend Denise's picture with this caption:
Linking my Peace. Running along the Allegheny River. 
Take a breath and connect your Peace with someone.
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It had a link that of course I had to follow, The Peace Chain. Who could resist such a company?

IT IS DENISE'S NEW COMPANY!

I was so excited I could hardly contain myself. How this slipped by me - perhaps the social media leave of absence had something to do with this - is a mystery.

I must share it here with all of you and I want all of you to check it out and order some and spread peace everywhere you can.

Until next time,
xo
Now I've been crying lately, thinking about the world as it is
Why must we go on hating, why can't we live in bliss

Cause out on the edge of darkness, there rides a peace train
Oh peace train take this country, come take me home again

Oh peace train sounding louder
Glide on the peace train
Come on now peace train
Yes, peace train holy roller

Everyone jump upon the peace train
Come on peace train
Yes, it's the peace train

https://youtu.be/_6mKMV0d2cs
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Midnight Phone Call

7/20/2015

4 Comments

 
At 12:06AM last night, my home phone rang - NEVER a good time, with a call from Bella, crying.

Right up front and most importantly, she is fine, unhurt, and healthy.

[Click on the pictures to see them bigger.]
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She had just left a party, and thankfully, was driving pretty slowly. As she continued down this dark road she heard a "pop" and then her car started to spin and turn.

EVERY single lesson she had in Drivers Ed kicked in and she remained calm, cool and collected. She knew not to panic and she knew to keep her hands firmly on the wheel.

Her back drivers side wheel CAME OFF while she was driving. As the car spun, both of her passenger side tires shredded and went flat.

If you look up and see just how perfectly straight her car ended up on a front lawn, missing the telephone pole and the rock wall in front of her, you know how extraordinarily fortunate we all are today.

For the local folks, Bella's car was the one facing in the wrong direction on the lawn of #422 Watch Hill Road.
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Across the street a mom, Mary, who is a teacher and her son, Michael came out and checked on her and gave her water.

From another house, a retired police officer, Gary, checked on her. He did, at first, think she was drinking - but when he saw the tire and further spoke to her, he knew she wasn't.

I insisted to Bella she is never allowed to disavow the power of woo-woo. There were angelic powers in play last night. Even she said it's a miracle she didn't get hurt.

Today, we took care of having the vehicle towed and junked.

Next up - getting a new car.

xo
And I think to myself
It's a beautiful night
And I know everything
Is gonna be alright
Yes now I know
It'll be alright

https://youtu.be/sq_u3OadGqQ
4 Comments

Bella ~ Class of 2015

6/29/2015

2 Comments

 
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Bella's yearbook ad
Bella is moving onward and upward with her life and I KNOW she is going to do amazing and great things!

In the past ten days, Bella turned 18, went to prom, went to orientation, and graduated yesterday.

She leaves for Costa Rica tomorrow for an 11 day adventure with the same company she has been away with for the past three years.

That's a lot on one kids plate!
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One of my favorite prom pictures
Last week was the senior breakfast, the senior bar-b-que, the senior awards dinner and time to get ready for graduation.

The Hen Hud Class of 2015 is a bright class. They had 78 Presidential scholars. There are kids headed to schools from East to West (California) and North (Canada) to South (Arizona, Florida). Ivy league schools, almost ivy, top 20, community, military and undecided. They are an adventurous group.

Bella was able to be a part of the quartet of young women singing the National Anthem as well as a few other pieces, including the senior song, "I Lived." (That song was also used as the senior dance piece. It is almost guaranteed to make me cry whenever I hear it.)

There were more than a few moving moments during this ceremony. The speeches were excellent. Bruce & Kathy getting their son Nicky's degree for him, as he is already at the Air Force Academy. Debbie presenting her daughter with her diploma. Seeing the pictures of Kate and Jack.
Photo credits: Debbie and Claire ~ thank you so much!
A shout out to the talented Sam Tetro for creating a senior video that had me weeping from the first note of the song "Home" to the ending videos. Bravo!
After the ceremony, 22 of us headed to Table 9 for a celebratory meal. It was so much fun! My sister Jane got this picture as they brought out dessert.
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Bella and Peter ~ the only picture of the day of the two of them!
This year, the high school added this fun feature to our scrolling billboard - so exciting to see where the kids are all heading!

In August, Bella will be a freshman at the University of Vermont. It was her first choice of schools, so I am delighted for her.
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Our school added this feature this year. Very cool!
Last week, we headed up to Burlington for orientation. It was a fantastic three days - seeing the campus, meeting new friends, both Bella and I - and having a chance to catch up with my niece Caitlan and her boyfriend Dave. Caitlan is a UVM alumni and remained in Burlington after graduation. They gave us a tour around town and heads up on the best places to get a bite to eat. We had dinner at a divine restaurant with them, catching up and getting to know Dave. (We like him a lot!)
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Cousins: UVM Class of 2019, UVM Class of 2011
Judging from Bella's reaction to orientation, I am assured she will not only get along stupendously with her roommate, but she will have a most marvelous time.
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Bella, a green girl, & Camille (Bella's roommate)
Like most parents, I am particularly proud of my kids. It's been an honor to raise Bella. She is confident, sassy, caring, hilarious, and one of my favorite people to take a road trip with. Ninety percent of the time I love her music. The other 10% of the time, I need quiet. (She hates that 10% for the record.)

Here's what I know about my Bella:
  • She has a smile that lights a room
  • She loves her friends
  • She loves having them hang out here
  • She loves a Carvel run
  • She is far more sensitive than she will ever let on
  • She honestly loves school
  • She likes to get good grades
  • She is not afraid to go out into the world and be herself
  • She knows I adore her

OH (!) the places I expect this kid to go.

Congratulations my Bella Girl!

I love you more than you will ever know...until you have your own kids.

Happy, Happy EVERYTHING!

xo
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Bella and I, along with my sister Jane and her daughter Colleen, and our friend Jean and her daughter Caleigh saw GLEE Live a few times.

All three girls graduated this year ~ Col and Caleigh from Yorktown High School on Saturday.

Colleen and Caleigh are both headed to SUNY Plattsburgh in the fall! Right across the lake from Bella.

Since the girls AND the show graduated this year, I thought, here's the perfect version to share.

Each of you have YEARS to LIVE.

DO it!

xoxo
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Caleigh and Colleen
I, I, I
I did it all
I, I, I
I did it all
I owned every second that this world could give
I saw so many places, the things that I did
Yeah with every broken bone
I swear I lived

https://youtu.be/qaqVwlkTENc
2 Comments

Summer Solstice Walk

6/24/2015

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Last Saturday was the end of a very long week for me. I was tired and fried and had seen the evolution of more updos in a 24 hour period than I ever imagined I would.

The weather was crappy on and off all day. Damp. Dismal. Even the occasional downpour.

At the end of this very long week I was going to a walk along the Hudson River to celebrate the beginning of summer. The summer solstice, the day with the most light in it.

I was in no mood for it. I was tired. I was drained. I wanted to go home to jammies and a book and HGTV.

However, along with Kacey and Demitra, I knew I had to show up. I knew I had to put on my big girl pants, and rain poncho, and hat. So, off to the river I went.

We changed the time. We changed the meeting point. We were starting at 8:00. Nope, scratch that, we're starting at 7:00. We're meeting at the top. Nope, we're meeting at the bottom.

Yes, we did all that. Ultimately, those of us who were at the lower parking lot met up with those from the upper lot who walked down and met us. I got there at 7:00 and others staggered in a bit later. In total we had nine women who needed this walk.

It appears more than one of us had the same kind of week. There was exhaustion and frustration and pent up nerves.

And then we gathered. And we walked. And Kacey brought along candles in lanterns. And we chit chatted.

We got to the end of the paved walk where there is a magnificent sun dial and sculpture commemorating 9/11. There was zero rain.

Demitra, as is our tradition, blessed the evening. Kacey read something from "Sanya Says." We went around the circle, as is also now our tradition, and said a few things we were grateful for. Kacey and I had brought all of the intentions that had been written at our past events. We had been saving them to give them up to the universe for all these months.
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Sunset on the summer solstice at the Croton Riverwalk.
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Intentions being set free
There is power in having water, and women, and fire all gathered together for good. Add in the song below, and it was extraordinary.

This was a few days after Charleston and we vowed that collectively we would continue to spread love to the best of our abilities. Eight white women and one black women, holding hands, praying, and doing a tiny bit to help each other and the earth.

I brought sparklers and we lit the night with joy and laughter. When we cleaned everything up, we marveled at being in such a magnificent place, in the dark, ultimately feeling one million percent better than when we arrived.

As is now also one of our traditions, we walked the half mile or so back in silence. Each of us immersed in our own thoughts - for our own good and for the good of all around us.

It was now about 9:30 and we were energized and invigorated and hungry. So, off to the diner we went to continue sharing the love.

YOU would have loved it.

Our next event is next Tuesday, June 30.

Join us at Hudson House on Main Street in Cold Spring, NY from 6pm - 8pm. 

The unforgettable Rock and Roll Randy Patterson will lead a lively and interactive workshop where we will discuss the four distinct personality types. Which one are you? And how can you best get along with the others? 

$5 per person. Cash bar.

Please text Kacey at 914.323.8343 to RSVP.
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We invite you to join us at any of our events. 

We have created a Facebook Page you are welcome to join, A Circle of Women. Between the three of us, all of our events are shared collectively on that page, our own FB pages as well as via email and this blog.

I hope to see you at an event soon!

xo

This is a glorious instrumental that will absolutely soothe your soul, calm your nerves and make you feel at ease.

https://youtu.be/BJMIQRfXfPY
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June Madness ~ Catching My Breath

6/17/2015

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My mother has said on many occasions, that for parents, the busiest months of the year are September and June; new beginnings and endings.

Hear, hear, I agree, amen, and a robust, "SERIOUSLY!"

Let's play catch up, shall we?

Peter finished his freshman year at college and returned home on Mother's Day. He had some well deserved horizontal time for a couple of days. He started working on the Thursday after he came home and has been at it Monday through Friday ever since. He is helping out a friend who is a DJ at big events. "Mom, here's the truth about drunk women. They are hilarious. NOT very pretty...but hilarious." (As if men are all that attractive in the same state...) He is playing baseball and softball. He goes to the gym every day. He has a new (for him) truck that you can hear coming from quite a distance away. He loves it. He tends to be the voice of reason more often than not in this house. It's terrific to have him home.

Bella's 18th birthday was last Wednesday night. She and I went out to dinner as the men in the house had other obligations they needed to attend to.

Thursday was the prom. This is my favorite close up of the 150+ pictures taken that night.

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Bella's dress was spectacular. She took pictures with all the guys she has been friends with for years and it confused a friend of mine on FB because she couldn't figure out who her date was. Because this girl is so awesome, she went without a date. And had a superior time.
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The kids all slept here after prom and were up and at 'em to Seaside, NJ (along with MANY other high schools, apparently) by 9:15 Friday morning. A grand time was had by all!

All of Bella's exams are done. This allows her to sleep in and relax after an incredibly hectic senior schedule.
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The salon has been super busy with proms, weddings, and everyday hair. We have a couple of more weeks of updos galore and then we can go back to color and cutting and keratins - THE must have hair treatment as we head into the summer months of frizz.
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Kacey, Demitra and I are hosting a Solstice Walk along the Hudson River on Saturday, June 20 to celebrate the light of the solstice. 

We will, of course, have a blessing, no doubt a meditation, a few other beautiful rituals, and no doubt a lovely time.

If you would like to join us, we are meeting at the parking lot by the fields (and the bathroom), past Senasqua and the Croton Yacht Club, at 8:00PM. There is no charge for this event.

xo

Catching my breath, letting it go,
Turning my cheek for the sake of the show
Now that you know, this is my life,
I won't be told what's supposed to be right

https://youtu.be/HEValZuFYRU
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A Walk in Quiet

6/1/2015

7 Comments

 
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photo credit: Corinne Stanton
Kacey, Demitra and I had an entirely different day planned for yesterday. But, as Demitra pointed out (and I knew) Mercury is totally in retrograde, and as such, things change. We ended moving from an indoor venue to the peaceful, beautiful Chuang Yen Monastery. Thanks to Kacey for coming up with the inspiring location.

Kacey got us started. As always, Demitra led us in a beautiful blessing. And then we walked. In quiet.
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Time shared with beautiful women ~ Kacey & Demitra
I have had a lot of noise, chatter, phones ringing, and blow dryers in my life. And as much as I am "on" while at the salon, I am someone who craves quiet and solitude. I need peace. I need to retreat into my own little world and come out when I am ready. I have honestly not had that for far too long.

Today, we spent a small bit of time, probably ten minutes, in quiet contemplation of the women who have guided us - past, present and future.
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We walked in silence to the "Lady on the Lake" (the goddess Kuan Yin, an 18' stature that was placed there on 4-28-94) and tossed three stones in honor of our amazing women. (That's where the picture up top was taken.)

As we walked along we came upon gorgeous sights.
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We walked back to the Great Buddha Hall - a vast and glorious space to spend in quiet contemplation. It is the home to the largest Buddha in the Western Hemisphere. At 37 feet tall and surrounded by 10,000 tiny Buddhas, it is a spectacular sight to behold. We took our shoes off and entered.
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photo credit: Corinne Stanton
The woman on the floor was chanting her morning prayers the entire time I was in the hall. It was soft and lyrical; her song filled the cavernous space with a lilting joy. As much as it is a place of reverence, there was the sound of young children laughing and running through the space. Life, it is always happening.

We walked back to the parking lot and shared a quick tailgate snack. We mingled with our new friends. We pulled cards from Amy's lovely oracle deck. Corinne took a short, wonderful video asking each of us to share what "got" from the day. Demitra finished the day with a blessing of goodbye and then everyone began their day, again, in my case, a little more peacefully than two hours before.

As soon as I turned right out of the driveway, the skies opened up. Leaving me feeling refreshed, clean, and grateful, as always for the power of women.

xo
I love listening to Snatum Kaur.
Her music makes me feel uplifted, present and delighted.

https://youtu.be/gPbmJwHmbDA
7 Comments

Last Dance

5/21/2015

2 Comments

 
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Tonight is Bella's final dance class. How can that be?

Somewhere, in my many envelopes of photos are the pictures of Bella from her first dance class. I don't really need the photos. I can remember her sheer joy at dancing on Saturday mornings with Miss Aurette at Dance Magic.

For some foolish reason, we left Dance Magic for one year and went to the Town of Cortlandt to dance for a season. It was fun, but it wasn't the same.

So back we went to a place we had missed.

While waiting for Bella during class, I would watch in awe as the older girls came through the doors. Poised. So sweet to the little girls. Kind. Confident. And I knew, no matter what, that for as long as she wanted to dance, I wanted Bella to be a part of this world.

One week, in a completely surprising move, Dance Magic closed.
  
W-H-A-T?! What would the girls do? Where would they dance?

Like salons, there are more than a few dance studios around. We checked out several. They are wonderful, but they weren't the right fit for Bella.

AND THEN. There was joy in the land. Jody and Diane were going to open a studio. Until the new studio was opened, dance was held at a restaurant, because hey, it worked.

We were delighted when Hudson Dance and Tumble Center opened 90 seconds from our house.

At the studio, besides the obvious, dancing, Bella learned confidence. Strength. She participated on the competitive dance team when that was offered. That experience taught her how to work within a group in a way that is different from team sports. She made friends from other schools. 

She has two "dance sisters," Sam and Marissa, who have been in every show together since they were five. They live in a different town. The beauty of them growing up and driving is they will always be able to see each other. Sam graduated last year. Bella this year. Marissa next year. How lucky to have such great friends! You know I will be at Marissa's showcase next year.
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Photo Credits (always): Carol Palazzo
Not only has Bella met amazing women, so have I. From the parents of the kids Bella's age and older, to the parents of the little ones, the studio is a haven. A place to sit in the lobby and chat. To compare the stories of raising these amazing young girls. I ADORE the staff. Love and adore and am so glad we are all friends.
Jody will hold a place in the entire family's heart forever and a day. The heart and soul of the place, Jody's artistic visions make their way onto the stage thanks to the brilliant choreography by the teachers who make it happen.

I have yet to attend a show and not cry. It's what I do. (Me and Chris...we're peas in a pod!)

Claire and Laura are the faces at the desk. The calm in the storm. The women who have all the answers. Without them, it just wouldn't be the same.

Bella has taken tumble, tap (very briefly), jazz and ballet for years.

Colleen was Bella's first tumble teacher. Colleen moved to Florida, but thanks to FB, keeps up with all the activity up north. Aaron took over tumble and suddenly, there was flying through the air with the greatest of ease. It has been so much fun to watch her flip and twist and turn and move on mats.

MARY, Mary, Mary. Perhaps THE single greatest influence in Bella's life two times a week for so many years. Confidant. Teacher. Friend. Private lesson giver. I remain steadfast that we will never lose touch.

My favorite line, ever, from Mary, when Bella was just seven and in her first show, "Maggie...could you remind Bella she's not the director? We've got this."

Cait. THANKS for the private lessons, you darling woman, you. I know you and I will forever stay in touch.

Mary and Cait made Bella's solo a dream come true. She had only been thinking about it for something like six years. Bella's solo took my breath away. It was glorious. 
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This year, I watched the show with the knowledge it was Bella's last. People ask me how I feel about her leaving for college in the fall. I can say in all truthfulness, it is nowhere near as hard as knowing this was the last recital for my girl.

Bella was one of eight seniors moving on to greatness. When they danced to "I Lived" I saw them all as the young women they all are...and as the little girls they were.
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The Seniors: Dancing to "I Lived"
The three year-olds, as always, needed only to walk on the stage to the collective "Awww" of the audience.

The ballet blew my mind. Gorgeous.

Cait's lyrical and hip hop numbers were so outstanding I am clapping while writing this.

Each and every number was a sight to behold.

A simple Saturday morning class called "Move and Groove" in 2000 morphed into a community, a family, a home away from home, a safe haven to be with people who care about you and who you care about. Summer Camp that was not only fun, but filled with important life lessons.

Unless Jodes goes crazy and stages an alumni dance (give it some thought, I like the idea!) it is unlikely Bella will ever dance with HDTC again.

But OH, what a magnificent experience.
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Rest assured, I am ready to be a backstage helper whenever you ask. I think LD and I could have a future as the "mean duo who make everyone follow the rules."

Thank you seems entirely too inadequate.

It's all I've got.

Thank you. ALL of you who have ever held a place in Bella's dance life. Gretchen. Aurette. Colleen. Kait. Barbara. Miss Barthelmes. Diane. Jody. Joelle. Katie. Mary. Aaron. Caitlin. Suzi. Susan. Claire. Laura. For 15 superb years. It went entirely too quickly. xo

With all my love,
Maggie

Music today - Bella's solo music. We were asked not to video, so I didn't. There is a CD of the show, but I don't know how to just show you Bella's solo. If I figure that out, I will share.

PS - clicking on any picture will make them bigger.
Leave your fear of love behind
Let your dreaming be your guide
If you seek then you shall find

Turn the tide in from the fallen
Waiting to rise up again
I can feel it in blood
I hold the future in my hand

https://youtu.be/sFvzv1h3UHk
2 Comments

Let's Hear It For The Teachers

5/12/2015

2 Comments

 
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image: http://bit.ly/tghr2015511
I am a week behind publishing this. It still matters.
Warning: It's a lot of words.

I have a high school senior and a college freshman who are wrapping up their academic year.

Last week was teacher appreciation week.

In past years, I have written to the teacher, principal, and superintendents when my kids have had stellar teachers. This year, I am writing a blog post. To encompass them all. Because they deserve recognition ALL the time.

My kids were day care babies. From a very early age they interacted with people who have been magnificent. I can't say enough about Montrose Child Care Center and the impact this small facility had on my kids.

To this day, some of their best friends are from the baby room. The women in the day care dealt with an infant who was a breath holder. No easy task. They potty trained my toddlers. They had to hire an additional staff member for nap time because I had the kid who wouldn't sleep. The taught them their letters. They taught them manners. They taught them compassion.

They taught ME the same things.

It really is a shame little kids don't remember these caregivers because they are the ones who shine bright in the beginning. Fifty-one weeks a year, five days a week, my kids had quite the day! Fun with friends, learning without even realizing it and getting love from lots of people.

And then they moved to elementary school...

Frank G Lindsey Elementary School.

These were the years where the next best friends were made.

It was my kids home for seven years.

I can literally hear the kids on the playground from my house and it is a sound I have come to love. Every Memorial Day there is the parade that comes right past my house - the JOY on the kids faces, especially the little ones, is priceless.

Except for kindergarten, my kids had the same teachers all through elementary school.

Flora Wistreich began Peter's introduction to FGL in kindergarten along with Halette Sharkey. Terry Pierce was Bella's kindergarten teacher. They each went on to have Dory Antonini in 1st grade.

They were fortunate enough to be in a multi-age class in second and third grade - so for one year they were actually in the same class. For three years I had the privilege of working with astounding women. Barbara Pettersen and Robin Dolacky had a profound influence on my entire family. Peter learned public speaking. Bella learned to love, in no particular order, sparkly nail polish, perfume, nice smelling lotions and all things glittery. They both learned script AKA cursive - which will now be a lost art. We started watching American Idol the year Bella was in 2nd grade because it was, indeed, the talk of the classroom. The learned according to where they were in their academic world, not their age.

When Peter was in 4th grade and Bella was in 3rd grade we adopted Tucker, the wonder pup. He was smuggled into the school and loved by all.

Each of my children had the inordinately special Jenny Stack in 4th grade. Love oozes from every inch of her body. She GETS kids. Colonial Day was a hit. During a year when it is testing, testing, testing, they still thrived. 

Fourth grade for Bella's class was particularly challenging for Jenny. My friend Janet's son's leukemia returned and he subsequently passed away in March of that year. His twin sister was in a different class and that group of teachers provided a safe haven. They explained what was going on in age appropriate terms, and held them in their hearts when he died.

To this day, this group of kids, now all seniors, remain some of the most compassionate and kind kids I know. They are tight. They are friends, even if they don't all hang out in the same crowd. The have each others backs. Much of the credit has to go to that group of fourth grade teachers and the teachers before them. They knew Jack and Kate and would hold the questions of babies, really, in their hearts to make sure the kids had a grasp of what was happening while letting them still be kids. It was witnessed compassion and you can't make that up.

Fifth grade was a circle of teachers. Preparing our kids for middle school, they went to different teachers - each of them fantastic. Kelly Dyckman had them loving math from the get go. Rita Many moved then forward in reading and writing and science. Megan McConville was the social studies teacher. How much fun was it when we realized Meg's mom had adopted Tucker's mom!

Then, of course, there was the librarian, the art teacher, the music teacher, the band teacher, and even the nurse, where Bella was able to keep a large supply of Barbie Band Aids for anyone in need.

And then they moved up to the middle school...

It takes a special person to teach preteens and teens. Hormones on the warpath makes for some interesting situations.

Blue Mountain Middle School

The place where three elementary schools come together as one.

Each of my kids have always been involved in sports. It made the transition to the middle school a little bit easier since they knew so many kids from the various teams they had been on.

Like at FGL, my kids had the same teachers in middle school from year to year.

I always count who was talked about at the dinner table as the teachers who have made a wonderful impact on my kids.
  • Fred Frost - he made reading and essays fun. He expected A LOT from the kids and they delivered.
  • Stacey Siegel - suddenly math wasn't too much of a chore. (To the kids...me, I am happy for online banking and Excel!)
  • Killy Hayden - social studies was exciting and they loved his first name and the story of how he got it.
  • Sean Bugara - the man who made science come to life in the fields and stream by the school. A wild and crazy dude who's idiosyncrasies were laughed about.
  • Amy Deegan - Bella fell in love with all things related to genetics this year and it started her on the path towards medicine.
  • Kelly McGillicuddy - and once again, reading was fun.
  • John Pezzola - "Pez" made dioramas cool and fun - albeit slightly stressful on the parents to find the correct color soldiers.
  • Kristin Martenelli - and suddenly three out of four Pinque's were speaking Italian. A love for this romance language was born in her room that continues to this day.

Band, chorus, art, and home and careers need a shout out as my kids have done their own laundry since the week they had to keep track of it for a grade. Amen, amen, amen.

Modified sports began and so did road trips to watch them play at other schools.

The guidance office is stellar.

John Owens talked me off the ledge more than once with his wisdom and his experience at having two kids a couple of years older than mine. Many a tear was shed in his office.

And then they moved to high school...

Hendrick Hudson High School

Here's where my kids continued to blossom under the tutelage of some outstanding educators. They had different teachers and yet they really did have many of the same teachers.

  • Scott Perlman - Health. Perhaps one of the most important classes taught in the district - probably a couple of years too late. Be that as it may, his name was in MANY a dinner conversations. Bringing home the babies for the teen baby project made for a loss of sleep for my kids, but they had a small, intense experience with a baby who thankfully wasn't real.
  • John Annunziata - History. "Nunz", a democrat who isn't afraid to share his views, definitely made Peter a better debater. He is an intense teacher who helped Peter think outside his comfort zone. He was one of the teachers who took both my kids to Italy last summer, so he holds a special place in my heart.
  • Melissa Golia - Italian. She continued the love of Italian with both kids. Bella's classes have always been chatterboxes, really, really smart chatterboxes who somehow manage to do very well while discussing fashion. Melissa was another one of the teachers who took the kids to Italy last summer. Big love to her.
  • Andrew Lupien - History and Psych. "Lupe" has been Bella's "go to" teacher when things are hairy. A man who gets this age and who understands the pressures they are under. Bella has spent countless hours in his classroom just shooting the breeze and I am SO incredibly grateful he has been open to letting her vent. Kids need a teacher they can trust and confide in and Drew is just that man. Bella has been to Hawaii and Alaska with him and is heading to Costa Rica with him in July. Obviously, HUGE love to him.
  • James Rogulski - English. Anyone who can control a group of seniors who are SO ready to get out gets my vote. Jim DEMANDS good work and he gets it. He also gets respect. These are magnificent qualities in an educator - he is passionate about the books the kids read and he is passionate that their papers are well thought out and not just something they pulled out of their asses in the late hours the night before they are due. Rogo is "the man" according to my kids.
  • Corrine Rogulski - English. Corrine developed, designed, and created the class, "Transition to College" for the district. In it, my children wrote their college essays. They decided which schools they would apply to. They figured out the costs of the colleges and universities they liked. They whittled everything down and worked with a precise timeline. THERE IS NO WAY I COULD EVER SAY THANK YOU ENOUGH. Ever. This woman saved my sanity based on what I have heard from other parents whose kids did not take this class. I wrote about Corrine in October 2014 after the school experienced a lock down. She too was in Italy last summer. Again, buckets of love and kisses.
  • Richard Zangrilli - Economics and Social Studies. "Z" helped Peter decide on accounting, I am sure, because of economics. He helped Bella many, many times last year. He was a crowd favorite and he was quoted A LOT.
  • Joseph Kalata - Math. This man had Bella in his room day in and day out, usually frantic, over math. It was endless. Kalata would talk her off the ledge of mathematical craziness with a regularity that deserves a medal. I know she misses her one on one time with him!
  • Meg Greiner - Athletic Trainer. I am convinced there is not another kinder, compassionate, talented, professional Athletic Trainer in the world than Meg. If your kid gets hurt (and my kids have gotten hurt) you want her on the field. You want her in her office each and every day prepping the kids for whatever sport they play. Taping. Icing. Giving them Cup-A-Soup to stop cramping. Meg is an A#1 amazing person and I am totally grateful my kids had her in their lives when they needed her.
  • Francois Barcomb - Physics. Francoisbarcomb is really all one word. God bless this man as he had an incredibly bright group of kids asking him a million questions about a subject I can't even fathom taking.
  • Erica Denler - Chorus. Bella has thrived in music. There is nothing like the concerts this woman puts on for the three choruses. Enchanting. Beautiful. Moving. My personal favorite is the annual winter concert when the alumni come back to join the current chorus to sing the "Hallelujah Chorus." I cry every time.
  • Meg Jandrasits - in Peter's freshman year, Meg taught THE class that got Peter interested in accounting. It was five years ago and my brain is mush now, so I don't remember the name of the class, but boy, oh boy, did she get him interested in business and numbers and money!

I must also give shout outs to Maura Koch for making accounting interesting for Peter and for her steadfast belief in his abilities. Christine Caiazzi for being Bella's confident as well as chaperone in Hawaii, Alaska and the upcoming Costa Rica trip. She is Bella's PIG (Part In Government) teacher this year, so she finally has her for a teacher as well as a mentor. Buckets of love to Caiaz! Bernie Small for making Peter laugh through math - and Bella cry. Stephen Purcigliotti - AKA "Stevie P" for also chaperoning in Italy and for Peter's senior year of social studies. Antonietta Gliubizzi - AKA Senora Gliubizzi, for finishing up Bella's final year of Italian with not only a trip to the opera but to Little Italy as well. Clare Carey - who made sure Peter has a muffin or two last year and who would let my kids eat even when their account balances dipped into negative numbers.

And then, they graduated.

With each year I have been involved in the schools (it's been 16 but who's counting...), I have witnessed moments of thriving and moments of distress from each of my kids. Naturally I prefer thriving. However, as our pediatrician told us when Peter was a toddler, "Frustration is the catalyst to learning."

There are no perfect teachers. There are no perfect students. But there are perfect teachers for each kid and mine have been fortunate to have more than a few.

Our kids got a great education that has prepared them well for college. And it started when they were just babies.

Peter is home from his first year at college and he is a delight to be with. He has matured. He has always been funny, now he's funnier. I cried when he left for college last year. That was silly. He will be home until September 6. ALMOST FOUR MONTHS. There is zero reason for tears ever again.

Bella is weeks away from graduation. She has three AP tests in the bag and one on Friday. I see her FINALLY starting to relax. She still wants excellent grades, but she's no longer insane about it.

My most sincere thanks to the teachers and every single staff member who have had such a positive impact on the lives of my kids. You don't have to be labeled a teacher to teach. You just have to care. You did and do make a difference with what you do.

You may have summers "off" but boy you have to be ON when they are in the throes of each milestone in their lives, and for that, you deserve a summer off. And even more thanks. 

Here's to you. I appreciate you all.

xo
This song is for those, who inspire us today;
Who always lend a helping hand, to help show us the way.
This song is for those, who see their students through;
The tough times in their lives, for that we say thank you.

https://youtu.be/vwsKWiXlA78
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    Maggie Pinque

    Believer in making dreams come true.
    Intuitive Card Reader.
    Author.  
    Inspirational Speaker. 
    ​Beacon of Optimism.

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Maggie Pinque

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maggie@theglasshouseretreat.com
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